Internet dating is not for the shallow or the weak, but for the brave and the intrepid. 

My first Internet dating account took me over an hour to set up and was immediately rejected because I am separated and not yet divorced. I briefly considered suing the company for millions—both for lost time and for the lost dating opportunities that would have kept me busy this summer—but bravely moved on.

The next dating site I tried seems can be described as a combination of things you’d find on Craig’s List, a local weekly’s personals ads, and a dating site; I’ll refer to it as Internet Dating Lite Site from here on out. I set up the profile myself (yes, kudos definitely go to me for the cutesy writing and introduction on my profile) and labored for ten or twenty minutes to find a pic or two. The first pic was from a web cam and was labeled creepy by an advisor, so I had to choose some others that don’t look so much like mug shots.

I didn’t have to wait long for the replies to arrive; I sifted through the replies and responded to a few that seemed interesting. My personal favorite response was a short message from Bigdaddlicious who wanted to meet me for drinks. Of course, I had to tell him that I couldn’t meet anyone for drinks with the nickname Bigdaddlicious based on principles alone. He seemed surprised at my response, and I’m guessing that Bigdaddilcious gets judged by other girls more based on his profile pics (all totally smoking hot) than his nickname (the jokey antithesis of hot).

I got another message from a young European that seemed appealing until I considered the extreme age gap between us and what might be my competition for a guy this young. It’s a lot easier to joke about being the next Demi Moore when you’re still safely in a relationship than it is when you are in the cold, hard dating world.

I did get a few nice messages from guys that seemed more like people I would date, but I started to feel weirder about those kinds of guys than the guys I would never seriously consider dating. I’ve been out off the market for quite some time and am not yet sure how the rules and etiquette of dating actually work.

Don’t worry, though. I’ll definitely keep you posted when I get my feet wet.

Image from Flickr User Don Hankins.